Thursday, March 14, 2013

Quenched in Dry Places




 

Come, all you who are thirsty… Isaiah 55:1


About a month ago, I decided to do a weekly study with my 13-year-old daughter written by Women of Faith speakers about managing emotions.   I wanted some quality time with my girl.  With her recently embarking those tedious teenage years, this study seemed appropriate for both of us. Last week’s chapter was called, “The Doldrums” and addressed spiritual dryness, periods of time when we wander in the dessert.  My daughter was unfamiliar with this subject and asked me to explain to her what it means.

After describing my take on spiritual dryness, I gave her some examples in my life. Sometimes spiritual dryness takes over when I allow my apathy and the things of this world come between me and my relationship with God.  Other times, God is building my character and teaching me more about him.  That is called sanctification.  My daughter said, “It is like when you are teaching a baby to walk.  Sometimes you stand by him and hold his hand, and other times you let go to encourage the baby to take a few steps on his own.  He may stumble and fall, but you are nearby to help him back up.” 

 God has definitely communicated and worked with me in different ways through my life journey.  During some of the most difficult and heart-breaking times in my life, he lavished me with his love and power. Other times he seemed to be stepping back and allowing me to stumble through growing pains.

 

FLOODGATES OF GRACE

 In 2003, my parents were visiting from out-of-state, and they were very joyful that I was expecting my 2nd child.  My sister-in-law, Angie, offered to do an ultrasound for my parents.  I thought it would be fun to share the experience with them, so we made arrangements.  I was very excited to share this special moment with our daughter as well.  She was 4 at the time.  At the appointment, we were upbeat and laughing, however the mood turned sour as Angie told me she could not find a heartbeat.   My joy turned to panic, and my parents quickly escorted our daughter out of the room.  After doing another test, she confirmed that the baby did not show signs of life.

 Words cannot describe the shock and grief I felt in that moment.   Angie left to give my husband, Mel, and I some time to talk things over and grieve together.  I’ll never forget Mel getting down on his knees and telling me it wasn’t my fault and that no matter what he would always love me.  Then, he prayed over me.  I silently cried out to God and prayed, “God, I can’t handle this.  You have to help me through this.  I am all yours.  You can do whatever you want with me.”

 The next morning, I woke up weeping and petitioning God for guidance.  A gentle voice in my mind told me to look up the verse, Romans 5:1-5.  I confess that I had been reading the Bible at this point in my life, however I was unfamiliar with parts of the Bible, especially the epistles.  When I opened up my Bible to Romans and read what God had to say, I was overwhelmed with his presence and peace.  There is no other explanation but this had to be from God to lay such a verse on my heart at that moment.  “Therefore, since we have been justified through faith, we have peace with God through our Lord Jesus Christ through whom we have gained access by faith into this grace in which we now stand.  And we rejoice in the hope of the glory of God.  Not only so, but we also rejoice in our sufferings, because we know that suffering produces perseverance; perseverance character; and character hope.  And hope does not disappoint us, because God has poured out his love into our hearts by the Holy Spirit, whom he has given us.” Romans 5:1-5.

 All I can say is that God made true to his promise in this verse.  I was overcome with God’s love and grace through his Spirit, family members, co-workers, and people from our church.  I felt a kinship with God in my heartbreak that was supernaturally peaceful and comforting.  I had a couple excruciating weeks of carrying the unborn baby, however God was with me every step of the way.  He was with me in the emergency room when they had trouble getting the bleeding to stop.  He was with me the overnight stay in the hospital.  He was with me the days following when our family said goodbye to the life we would never know this side of heaven.  Despite my sorrow, I couldn’t get enough of God and his deep love for me.  It was like water for my thirsty soul!  Out of that grief, God built a spiritual gift of intercessory prayer for others.

 

THROUGH THE DRY VALLEY

 Since then, I have been led through times of spiritual famine and renewal, however the period of time between 2006 and 2012 seemed like the most lengthy dry spell.  Looking back, I realize God was sanctifying me through health problems and painful circumstances, and my stubborn nature was fighting him.  I was struggling with my desire to do things my way.  Then, I had what I call my Job experience in 2010, which lasted almost 2 years. 

 After forgiving others, confessing sins, and telling God multiple times that I was ready to give him control over my life, God seemed silent to my prayers.  I begged him.  I pleaded with him.  I fought to do what I thought he wanted.   I commanded the devil to leave me alone, yet God was still silent. I sensed he was there all along.  He somehow pulled me through each moment of pain and suffering.  He was always there in the nick of time, yet he was silent to my begging for healing and guidance.  Finally, I gave up fighting and told him I was OK with suffering through the pain of my illness if that was what he wanted.  I told him I was ready to listen to what he was trying to teach me.  That was the turning point in my relationship with God.

 

BESIDE STILL WATERS

 
Eventually, he started giving me more of himself in small ways during my daily Bible studies. When, I went outside last summer to putter in the garden, lay in the warm grass, and watch the birds, he was always there quietly joining me.  His peace touched me like rays of sun in gentle breezes and quiet thoughts.  Those quiet times with God gave me both pleasure and peace.  His voice steadily grew stronger as he began to reveal to me areas of my life he wanted to build on.  While in 2003, God poured his love and grace on me, this time he initiated a long painful process of unveiling a new dimension of his presence.    

 The other day, I came across a passage written by Henry Blackaby that spoke directly to the heart of this situation.  It described Blackaby’s interpretation of what Jesus might have been saying to Mary regarding her bother, Lazarus’s, death.  Mary was very distraught that Jesus waited until after Lazarus had died to come when he could have healed him beforehand.  In that moment, Mary had no idea that Jesus could conquer death:   (Jesus speaks to Mary)“If I had come, your brother would not have died.  You know that I could have healed him because you have seen Me heal many, many times.  If I had come when you asked Me to, I would have healed him.  But, you would have never known any more about Me than you already know.  I knew that you were ready for a greater revelation of Me than you have ever known in your life.  I wanted you to come to know that I am the resurrection and the life.  My refusal and My silence was not rejection.  It was an opportunity for Me to disclose to you more of Me than you have ever known.”  Henry Blackaby, Experiencing God. 

 

COME ALL WHO ARE THIRSTY

 When I start to feel down about my struggling health and everyday gripes, I am reminded of the times I have encountered God through the years and how he has been faithful in loving me in each unique way he has revealed himself to me.  I especially look back to my Job days and remember how he saw me through the dry valley and brought me to springs of hope that quenched my spiritual thirst.

If anyone is thirsty, let him come to me and drink.  Whoever believes in me, as the Scripture has said, streams of living water will flow within him.  John 7:37-38

Friday, March 8, 2013

Letters to Heaven




Our baby would have been nine years old this March, but it wasn’t God’s plan for her to be born into our world.   In remembrance of our unborn child, my husband, Mel, and I wrote letters to the baby and put them in a helium balloon.  Our family then gathered for an emotional time of reflection and prayer near Mel’s father’s grave.  After reciting Psalm 23 and praying together, we said goodbye to the one we would never know on earth and released the balloon to heaven.  As the due date approached nine years ago, I prayed for God’s wisdom about the sex of our unborn child and asked for a name.  I needed this for closure.  In my heart, God gave me an answer, and so she is called Faith Ann.
This is the poem I wrote:

It’s a Girl!

I read my Bible to find healing
and look at a picture on my bookmark of Jesus
carrying a baby gently in his arms,
Kissing her.
It reminds me of a dream I had…
Jesus steps out in all of his glory in the kingdom of heaven,
Streets lined with gold,
Friends and family gather in eternal worship.
Jesus stands before them,
Holding a baby in his arms and announces,
“It’s a girl!”
Grandparents, aunts, uncles are filled with joy.
Angels sing in worship of God who is creator of all things,
All life.
Faith, my dear, you are blessed to be raised by angels and saints
in the divine kingdom…
To sit at the feet of Jesus and learn your first words.
Someday, we will meet and embrace
to spend eternity with our king!
Love, Mommy
March 18, 2004 (Faith’s due date)

For more about Faith's story:  http://dzehm2.blogspot.com/2017/03/faiths-legacy.html


Sunday, March 3, 2013

Migraine Headaches—Piecing the Fragments



It was a fall day in 2006. I was rushing from my job in the Twin Cities to pick up my kids from their daycare.  I wanted to run to the chiropractor before going home to make supper and do the usual household chores.  When I arrived at the daycare, I was overcome with a sharp pain in my head.   It felt like a vice was squeezing my head.  I was somewhat overwhelmed with nausea and dizziness, and my vision seemed a little fuzzy.  I thought I was just a little dehydrated, so I asked for a drink of water and loaded the kids into our SUV.   I didn’t want to be late for my appointment.  Unfortunately, I never made it there.  20 minutes later, I ended up in the emergency room with my first diagnosed migraine headache.

 WHAT ARE MIGRAINES?

 Classic migraines are typically thought of as severe headaches that become incapacitating because of excruciating pain, vision changes, and nausea/vomiting.  They can last for hours or days at a time.   The migraine sufferer may need to lay down in a dark room while coping with these strong symptoms.   Migraine symptoms are diverse and vary over a spectrum of severity.  Symptoms can include feelings of pressure, tightness, burning, vibrating, tingling, pulsating, stiffness, soreness, etc.  Migraine sufferers may experience auras of light in their field of vision, dizziness, ringing in their ears, sinus congestion, stiff neck, and sensitivity to light and/or sound.

 Migraines are considered to be vascular in nature, and they affect the blood vessels of the head.  Some doctors describe the vessels as swollen, inflamed, and/or pulsating.  Other sources suggest there is an uneven distribution of swelling and constriction of blood vessels in the head, and the migraine pain occurs as blood travels from wide spaces through narrower places in the vessels.  Some migraine sufferers describe having neurological symptoms such as vertigo/balance problems, numbness/tingling in the face, clumsiness of hands and/or legs, brain fuzziness or fog, and in some cases memory loss and/or confusion. 

WHAT CAUSES MIGRAINES?

 There is some debate about what really causes these headaches. Some people describe what is known as a “mechanism of a migraine.”  Theoretically, our bodies carry a threshold for migraine headaches.  Varying factors as well as genetic makeup will determine whether an individual has a high or low threshold.  When migraine triggers surpass the threshold, the migraine mechanism is activated.  Those who do not experience migraine headaches would theoretically have higher thresholds.  Anyone who has a headache might be experiencing a partial activation of this mechanism.  When the mechanism is fully activated, you experience a migraine. The goal would be to remove enough triggers to get below the migraine threshold.

 MIGRAINE TRIGGERS

 It is believed that various factors can trigger migraines.  I am not a doctor or an expert on migraines, however I have done some research.  These potential triggers are based on what I have learned through research and have experienced myself.  They include hormone imbalance, menstrual cycle, stress, contraceptives and other prescription medications, dental amalgams (mercury fillings), metal implants, certain foods, withdrawal from caffeine and other addictive foods/beverages, hunger, sleep depravation, too much sleep, rigorous exercise, changes in the barometric pressure, perfumes/air fresheners, chemical exposures, exposure to mold, electromagnetic frequencies, and fluorescent lights.  Certain bacterial infections, viruses, and other pathogens can also cause headaches. 

  DIETARY TRIGGERS

 Some migraine triggers are easier to manage than others.  Dietary triggers often are one of the first things that are addressed because they are easier to control than environmental and physiological factors.   Common dietary triggers include chocolate, sugar, artificial sweeteners, caffeine, carbohydrates, yeast, MSG (Monosodium Glutamate found in processed foods, soy sauce, salty foods, soups, protein powder, etc.), foods with natural glutamate (peas, corn, soy), processed meats (hot dogs, lunch meat, cured ham, etc.), alcohol, vinegar, fermented foods, nuts, some citrus fruits, and some types of cheese. 

 Over the years, I have consulted with 2 different nutritionists to discuss nutritional factors that trigger migraines.  It took me several years of half-hearted efforts and trial and error before I decided to make a serious commitment to change my eating habits.  I started by removing gluten and dairy products, and eventually went on what is called an elimination diet.  I did not have much success with the diet, as the headaches didn’t go away when I eliminated the foods on the list.  It took a lot of research and reading about various migraine prevention and holistic diets as well as testing for food sensitivities before I came up what works for me. After altering my diet, I shed a lot of weight and almost completely eliminated my asthma symptoms.  Unfortunately, the dietary changes alone were not enough to manage my migraines.  I needed to reduce more triggers.

EXPOSURE TO CHEMICALS

 As a result of bioresonance testing and adverse experiences with certain chemicals, I have discovered that I am prone to multiple chemical sensitivities.  These sensitivities have made a huge impact on my headaches, therefore my family and I decided to make several adjustments to our home environment.  We use scent-free laundry detergent, laundry balls (instead of fabric softener that is scented or fabric sheets that carry fire retardants), chemical-free cleaning supplies, limited exposure to perfumes in the house, allergy-free dish soap, etc.  My husband, who is in the construction business, is careful about what chemicals he may carry home on his clothes.  He used low-voc paint when he re-painted one of our bathrooms.  When we have to use chemicals in the house, we isolate and ventilate that area as much as possible by closing door the door, leaving a window open, and using fans when needed.  I have a special mask I can wear to reduce exposure.  I am also very careful about what personal products I use—no fragrances and as little harmful chemicals as possible.   If you suspect chemical sensitivities are triggering your headaches, I suggest paying attention to how you react around household cleaners, air fresheners, perfumes, and other common chemicals.  You can remove them from your home environment and see if it makes a difference in how you feel.

EMF’S AND FLOURESCENT LIGHTS

Electromagnetic Frequencies or EMF’s (also referred to as electro-smog) derive from the technologies that we have come to depend on:  microwaves, TV’s, computers, lap tops, iPads, cell phones, and other wireless devices.  There is new research about the negative impact these technologies have on our overall health.  I believe that they affect my headache symptoms. Fluorescent lights also put off a frequency that can cause dizziness and trigger headaches.  Headache sufferers may describe experiencing headaches and other symptoms when shopping at stores with bright over-head fluorescent lights.  We are in the process of replacing most of the fluorescent lights in our house as I will react to them with dizziness and headaches. I try to limit my cell phone and computer use to reduce exposure. 

CONVENTIONAL VS HOLISTIC MEDICINE

 When choosing conventional medicine to treat migraines, it is not recommended to use over-the counter painkillers or “rescue” medications that quickly eliminate the migraines on a temporary basis. These tend to cause rebound headaches.  Dr. Buchholz recommends attempting to reduce triggers prior to using prescription medications, and only using certain medications for prevention when absolutely necessary.  In 2011, I started taking Propanolol to prevent my migraines.  I did not like the side effects and discovered that use of the medication can lead dependency on the drug, so my doctor tapered me off of it. I am cautious about prescriptions because of the side effects and toxins in them.  I prefer to detoxify my body and use holistic approaches of finding root causes and removing triggers for headaches.  I have a friend who uses a natural approach to treating migraines through her holistic doctor, however also sees a neurologist and takes a preventative medication.  She plans to use it until they are able to address the root causes of her headaches and manage them through removing enough triggers.  Her holistic doctor recently conducted bioresonance testing on this medication and the tests revealed that her body would respond well to it.  I believe it should be a personal decision whether or not you choose preventative medications, however you should be aware of the side effects and potential problems that could arise with taking them.

Magnesium and other natural supplements are sometimes used as a natural way to treat migraine headaches.  I have taken magnesium in the past as a part of my treatment regimen.  If you choose herbal remedies to help your headaches, I recommend consulting a professional to assist you in determining what would work best for you as each situation is unique.

HEALING FAITH

 We live in a broken world with pain and sorrow.  Headaches seem to be one of the many fragmented paths of this broken world.  As I have pieced together the fragments of this journey, faith has played a central role in my path toward healing.  I have trusted God to guide me through each step.  Through the years, I have found comfort and hope in the many promises that God has given me in his word. 

 Psalm 103:1-5:  "Praise the Lord, O my soul, at my inmost being, praise his holy name.  Praise the Lord, O my soul, and forget not all his benefits—who forgives all your sins and heals all your diseases, who redeems your life from the pit and crowns you with love and compassion, who satisfies your desires with good things so your youth is renewed like the eagles."

RESOURCES

I am NOT a doctor or an expert on Migraine Headaches.  This article is not intended to be used as medical advice.  If you are experiencing migraines, I recommend you seek medical attention from a professional who specializes in headaches.

Other resources on migraines:


http://www.naturalnews.com/036793_migraines_natural_remedies_solutions.html

This website is very informative about the hidden sources of MSG, a common migraine trigger:

http://www.msgtruth.org/avoid.htm

Other resources on chemical sensitivities and the harmful effects of EMF’s:

http://www.multiplechemicalsensitivity.org/multiple-chemical-sensitivity-3.php

http://www.naturalnews.com/022926_EMF_cell_phone_home.html